amalthia: (Default)
[personal profile] amalthia
Tonight feels odd, I just spent an hour browsing through livejournals, absorbing other people's days and thoughts. And yet I still feel adrift, like I'm not apart of anything and not sure if I have the time to be involved in an online community. I think part of me always feels like i'm on the outside looking in, never realizing until i'm writing a post like this that I DO have friends in the fan fiction community. I guess I'm suffering at the moment from the grass is greener on the other side syndrome.

most of my online friends and contacts are from a online game, and it's odd because some of my friends from Space are women, and sometimes I want to talk about fan fiction and in particular slash and I have to stop myself in time realizing, that sure we have a common interest in gaming, but they'd probably be completely freaked or disturbed by my interest in reading about two guys getting it on.

I do have friends I can talk to about slash but sometimes I still feel like an outsider, actually I always felt like an outsider. Maybe there are just too many communities in fan fiction that I can't find what I'm looking for anymore. I think the closest I came to feeling like I was a part of something was when I was on this RoundRobin Mailling list. I had a great time, though at the time Ididn't have a lot of time to devot to writing.

it's funny, I read some authors are trying to pull away from the fan fiction communityl, so maybe I've been doing okay after all. Because 7 years later i'm still interested in slash fan fiction.
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